From 'The Wave' to 'Telephone': Baseball Fans Unite in Boredom, Vacate Stadium Mid-Game
SAN FRANCISO, CA — In what can only be described as an extraordinary ripple effect, a recent baseball game took an unexpected turn when fans' enthusiastic attempt at 'The Wave' spiraled into the world's largest game of 'Telephone.' The outcome? An unplanned, unanimous consensus that the sport is, in fact, an unparalleled cure for insomnia, led to a mass exodus from the stadium at the bottom of the third inning.
It all began at a Giants versus Mets game in San Francisco. As is tradition, fans initiated 'The Wave' in an attempt to inject a little excitement into the lethargic sport of baseball. Little did they know, this was about to take a drastic detour into something far more revealing.
One enthusiastic fan, apparently caught up in the moment, shouted, "Isn't baseball just so exciting?" into the ear of the person next to him as the wave approached. His tongue-in-cheek comment was picked up and, like a whisper in the wind, started its journey around the stadium.
As the message traveled, it morphed from "Isn't baseball just so exciting?" to "Isn't baseball really exciting?" to "Is baseball exciting?" to "Baseball is exciting?" to, finally, the damning "Baseball is excruciatingly dull."
When the final message returned to the original sender, he looked around, catching the eyes of thousands of similarly bored fans. They shared a nod of agreement before the first murmurings of a mass departure started to circulate. As if choreographed, everyone rose from their seats and exited the stadium, leaving behind a bemused set of players, a lonely hot dog vendor, and a solitary commentator attempting to relay the unexpected events to an equally confused audience at home.
In the aftermath of this bizarre incident, the Major League Baseball's governing body grappled with an unprecedented crisis. After a series of emergency meetings, MLB declared a shocking new directive: effective immediately, 'The Wave' and all similar forms of crowd interaction are banned from all baseball games.
The announcement triggered a flurry of reactions from fans. While some lamented the loss of 'The Wave,' many others voiced their relief, thanking MLB for saving them from further incidents of unintentional mass psychosis.
Meanwhile, baseball stadiums are reportedly exploring the idea of 'thrill factors' such as random firework displays and surprise stand-up comedy sets between innings in a desperate bid to retain their rapidly dwindling audience.
