Biden Joins UAW Picket Line Thinking It's Line for Ice Cream Truck

President Joe Biden eating ice cream at a UAW protest.

VAN BUREN TOWNSHIP, MI — In what might be the biggest blunder since he tried ordering a McFlurry at a Chipotle, a disoriented President Joe Biden somehow found himself in a picket line of discontented United Auto Workers, thinking he’d stumbled upon an exclusive ice cream gathering.

"I came for the Chunky Monkey! Yummmmmm!" Biden exclaimed, using a picket sign to shield himself from the Michigan sun, utterly oblivious to the disgruntled workers around him.

Union leaders, already in a foul mood, were less than thrilled. Treasurer Tony "Rusty Bolt" Rodriguez, infamous for his thunderous voice and aversion to dairy, grumbled, "Mr. President, we’re sweating bullets for our rights and you’re making a rocky road for negotiations".

Biden donned his UAW cap backward and declared, "I always knew the UAW was the backbone of this country, but I didn’t realize their popsicles were so um-diddly-scrumptious!” Biden then started chanting: “My ICE CREAM, My CHOICE! What do we want? ICE CREAM! When do we want it?  NOW!”

Gary Thompson, a 22-year-old visibly aging White House intern whimpered, “Someone please kill me or tell me this is a bad dream. I signed up for politics not a scoop of Protest Pistachio Parfait."

Veteran auto worker Bobby Jenkins griped, "I came here to fight for my pension, not watch a old geeza rave about brain freeze and fudge nuts!"

As Biden left, he wasn’t presented with union demands but rather a "Lifetime Gelato Guru" award from the dubious ‘Ukrainian Ice Cream Illuminati’ for his relentless service to the sugary and deadly secret society.

The day ended with the White House issuing a press release: "President Biden stands by every American who voted for him – whether you wield a wrench or a waffle cone. Go Chocolate chip!"